In the Beginning (part one A) - guest post

As Kari decided to publicly release the story of our first meeting (feel free to refresh your memory), I thought it befitting that I spell out my perspective of this encounter. It has been interesting to have people comment on this story and convey excitement for part two to be released, since part one was released over a year ago, I have taken it upon myself to officially produce part one A to provide a full perspective of this meeting. Enjoy!

 

Dating was tricky when Kari and I first met…you see, I had returned from serving a 2 year LDS mission and I struggled to find my “sea legs” of being home. Being a missionary significantly impacted who I was, my perspective significantly changed, I had set new goals, and I had a very different outlook on life. I came home to a “friendgirl” that waited for me, we did not have any specific plans of marriage or at least that we spoke out loud. I found as I came home that I changed so much and everyone else was mostly the same. I grew spiritually, developed a relationship with my savior, and gained a connection with the spirit that I never knew someone “like me” could have. So I dated my “friendgirl” but soon made it clear that I wanted to have an open relationship and date other people. So I did…I started dating several people, meeting them at school, at work, at church…it did not seem very hard to find girls to date.

 

As I started to look at taking the next step in my life of finding an eternal companion, I quickly found that the girls that I had been dating were not quite at the caliber that I was looking for in an eternal companion. It became apparent that finding the right girl to date was a lot more challenging than just getting a date. My quest had begun to find “the one” and this is the state in which Kari found me.

 

We first met at a friend’s house. At this July 1^st BBQ, I discovered that Kari new that it was Canada day and that she also knew the Canadian national anthem. Her Canadian familiarity was a big win in my book as I served in the Canada, Winnipeg Mission. There were other girls at the BBQ, steaks were served, but Kari stood out from the others by her genuine interest in others and her ability to play down her own strengths in order to help bring out the best in others. She was different, a good kind of different. We talked and laughed and before we said goodbye I asked her for her phone number. The next day I called her and asked her out on our first date.

 

When I asked Kari out I got the impression that she was being a bit hesitant as she seemed a little guarded and was very clear she was looking to just have fun and have a lot of friends. My interpretation of this was that she really did not know what she wanted but she would find out soon enough after we had our first date. I tried to be casual and funny which typically meant I came across as clumsy and awkward and I invited her out to dinner at a place that was public, familiar to me, not too expensive, not too cheap, and easy to get to. Afterward, we would go rollerblading at a nearby park because I was terrible at rollerblading, I had committed to mastering this skill, and it was out in public in a no pressure, fun environment.

 

The day of our date arrived. I went to work that morning in my usual jeans and button down shirt. All day I answered phone calls and helped users sign-up for dial-up internet, set-up email accounts, configure computer settings, and designing web pages. I left work on time knowing that I had to stop, change my clothes, run a comb through my hair, and add a light spray of my favorite cologne at the time, Cool Water.

 

When I pulled out of my driveway I felt good that I had made good time, I looked good, smelled good, I was looking forward to this fun date, and I was ready to turn on the charm, in a casual way of course.

I arrived just a few minutes early and so I walked to the appointed meeting spot and decided to just hang out casually for Kari to arrive. 10 minutes dragged by and I thought maybe she misunderstood where we were suppose to meet, so I walked to the restaurant to see if she was waiting there. No Kari. I walked around the area scanning in hopes of seeing her running just a bit late, nothing. I went back to the meeting place and no signs of Kari, I waited for several more minutes and by this time I was feeling, well, stood up. My thoughts were racing, “I hope she did not have any car trouble”, “Why in the world would someone be so inconsiderate and be so late, so late to a first date”, “how rude!”. I circled back again to the restaurant and resolved myself to leaving straight away if she was not there, I felt like I was wearing humiliation water instead of Cool Water and instead of cologne it was spray painted across my forehead. The humiliation intensified as I got to the restaurant again and no sign of Kari, I was resigned to lower my head, drag myself back to the car, and eat a nice slice of humble pie for dinner. I had never been stood up before. As I angrily sauntered back to my car and I was coming down the steps of the sky walk and someone was coming up, I did not even want to have eye contact as I knew they would easily see my forehead. I glanced at the person and to my surprise and bewilderment, it was Kari.

 

My face burned with humiliation. I couldn't think of a thing to say. The look on her face spoke more than she dared to say aloud; there was frustration, exasperation and disbelief clearly written into her countenance. For a moment we stood just looking at each other while my head spun I got glimpses of her beauty shining in her eyes that seemed to soften my anger.  I took a deep breath and politely smiled at her.

 

I suggested we head to the restaurant and keep our date, the air was still feeling a bit static, like the buzz of electricity around large power lines. I continued to compose myself as we walked and hoped that she would have a good reason for being so late. Finally she spoke.

 

“Do you like my haircut?" 

 

 

to be continued…